31 Everyday Ways to Connect with Your Child, Day 3: Touch
Today we’re going to talk about my very favorite way to connect with my kids. Touch.
I’m not a very touchy person. I don’t naturally reach out and touch other people. It’s easy to touch the babies, but once they got older I would notice that I wasn’t really touching them anymore. So I decided to change that. A few years ago I purposed to touch each child everyday, no matter how small of a touch. I wanted them to feel that connection with me.
I’ll sidle over to one of the teenagers in the kitchen and just bump them with the side of my body. A little love nudge. Or I will put my hand on their back or shoulder. If I’m standing behind them I might put my hand on the top of their head. Tap their nose, pat them on the back, hold their hand, sit right next to them so your sides touch, squeeze their elbow, muss their hair, hugs, kiss their cheek, anything to get a little touch in. My favorite and the one I use most is rubbing my hand across their back. “I love you,” I’m saying without speaking.
Sometimes older kids will seem uncomfortable. Don’t believe it. They need to be touched. You can make it light and natural. But do it every day. It’s important.
(And I want to add here that many of these connecting ideas will work for your husband too….especially this one!)
See you tomorrow!
Don’t forget to register for the free webinar on October 16 at Smoothing the Way! We’ll be going deeper into some of these ideas!
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I’m a hugger roomie!! Hehe! I love these posts because I’m using them for Colt. Of course, I can use some of them with Courtney and Cory too!
Cyndi
Good to know Cyndi! I’ll be prepared for the hugs when I see you next week! 🙂 Lisa~
Lisa, no kidding, I was just thinking about this today – about how I’m sure my 14 yo son still probably wants me to rub his back or give him big hugs. I try to make an effort to do those things more, but I think I need to amp up my efforts.
Great tip!! Thank you for sharing it with us.
I was just telling my hubby the other day that I needed to work on this one more with the kiddos. I’m not so touchy either so I have to think about it and do it. It really makes one of mine light up, so there is definately a need for it. Help me, Lord, to remember on a consistent basis so it will become a natural habit. Loving touch is a good habit to have;)
Lisa,
Thanks for your posts! I remember when I was a teenager I would be walking past my mom in the hallway of our home and she would just grab me and hug me. At first, I would just stand there all stiff and thinking about where I had been going and what I wanted to do. I would be thinking “Oh man! I wish she would let me go.” But my mom would just keep holding on. And after a few minutes my heart would start to thaw and I would feel her love seeping into me. When she would let go I would usually be thinking “I’m so glad she did that. I’m so glad she loves me.” This is a very important thing for moms to do. Thanks for putting it on your list.
Oh Kathy thanks so much for sharing that! We moms need to hear it every once in a while. You made my day (or night I should say). 🙂 Lisa~