My List

Wow!  What a weekend.  Wasn’t the weather glorious?!  No wonder it’s my favorite time of year.

I was worried about my time away.  I didn’t want to be away from my family and off where I couldn’t be reached.

But I tell you, it was the first time in a long, long time that I came home from a trip being more relaxed, more rested, more stress-free than when I left.

My friend and I agreed to separate during the day and then come together and talk in the evenings.  So I spent my time either taking walks in the woods or lying in the hammock.

I started Saturday morning reading Mary Beth Chapman’s book, “Choosing to SEE“.  I knew it would be a book that needed to be read in solitude.  I picked it up on Saturday morning after breakfast and was finished by 2:00.  I never got up, never stretched, never moved.  I cried through most of it.  God’s goodness, God’s mercy, God’s love for us flowed through me as the breeze wafted overhead. Occasionally I’d close my eyes and pray, “God, help me SEE.”

After I finished the book, I walked for about an hour.  My ipod poured songs of worship into my soul and I knew what I needed to do.

Make a list.

I found something to write on and listed every “extra” thing I have been doing.  Blog, Shop 24, Homeschool group, homechurch, etc.  “It’s time,” I would hear the Lord press, “time to remove some of these things from the list.”

I felt a little like Eustace in “The Voyage of the Dawn Treader.”  I have all of these scales and they need to come off.  It may hurt, but it is good.  So I began to scratch the surface.  What  blessing to have an uninterrupted moment to stop and examine it all.  I prayed, walked some more, prayed some more.  I am excited to let the Lord show me what to let go of.  It won’t be easy, but I will be better for it.

On Saturday afternoon I moved on to my next book, “The Help.”  It is not a Christian book and I am only about 3/4 of the way finished, but I am really enjoying it.  It came recommended by four different people.  I will save my review until I have finished it, but it will say that it was a great way to end my weekend.  I spend most of Sunday reading it.  Me, book, hammock, fresh breeze, solitude….not a bad way to end a weekend.

This Monday morning is a little of the “blast back to reality.”  My kids and James are being nice to let me ease in slowly.  The sound of the lawn mower at 7:00 am and the reek of urine coming from the boys’ room were my first reminder that I am back to Mommyland.  The place I live.  One I will never take off of the list.  In fact, it wasn’t on the list because it is inside of me, permanent, non-removable.  Mommy, wife, Christian.  Everything else on the list….everything….is removable.

That’s not to say that I will remove it all.  But I need to step back and look.  I am so grateful for a quiet refreshing time with the Lord.

My prayer for you is that you can get alone with your “list” and SEE .