I Did Something AWFUL!
Yesterday will be a day I will remember for a long time. I did something so terrible….shameful….a worst nightmare kind of thing…..
Since I’m the president of our homeschool group, sometimes I need to be informed of issues that the other leaders are dealing with. In yesterday’s case, there was a problem between two of the women and it was affecting some of the homeschool stuff. It wasn’t a major deal and I didn’t need to get involved or anything. But I wanted to send one of them an email encouraging her and letting her know that even though a person is difficult to deal with, we shouldn’t let it bring us down.
In my email I said something about being careful not to spread gossip and her only responsibility was in how she acted and not how the other lady acted, blah, blah, blah. I finished the email…..hit send…..NNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!
I realized in a fraction of a second that I sent the email to the wrong woman!!!! I sent it to the other woman involved in the issue! “Oh no! Oh no! Oh God please help me stop it!”
But it was gone.
I immediately thought, “OK Lord, help me figure out a way to sneak into her house and delete the email before she sees it.” But since I am not living in an episode of I Love Lucy, I dropped that idea.
This. Is. Horrible.
Even though I didn’t say anything bad about the woman, I knew that if I put myself in her place I would see it as Lisa calling me difficult and gossipy. I was nauseated. It made me sick that I would have done something that would hurt my friend or do any damage to their friendship with each other.
The long and the short of it was that I called the first woman (the intended recipient) and apologized for sending an email meant for her to the other woman (the unintended recipient) and told her I would do what I could to fix it. Then I called the unintended recipient, but she couldn’t talk right then. I tried to call her several times that day so I could apologize and answer any questions she had, but never got in touch with her. By now I know that it really hurt her (of course, it would hurt anyone) and it is something I am going to have to deal with over the next few days.
So learn from me. Always check the email address before you hit send. Even more importantly, always be sure your words are kind and your heart is pure no matter who you are talking to. I am grateful that I didn’t say anything mean or snarky in the email. Even a joke would have made that situation much worse.
Whew! There. Now you know. A simple mistake can have huge consequences.
And just so you know, James made me use the terms “intended recipient” and “unintended recipient.” It’s all just a part of the delight of living with a law student.
Yikes!
Most email clients have a feature that delays sending the email for a certain amount of time (Usually around 2 minutes) in order to prevent this kind of occurrence. You might consider using such an email client.
Oh Lisa! I have done this 2x. You are not alone. I learned valuable lessons from mine, too! Not only am I more careful what goes out on email, but I always check the recipient, too. These things happen in the days of instant communication, and the Lord knows your heart!
Thanks for sharing.
Victor, that is just what I NEED! I will look into it, thanks!
Oh Lori, I am glad to know I’m not the only one!
Lisa~
Another lesson that I’ve learned (the hard way)–when drafting just such an email, but saving it to pray over and work on later, make certain that YOUR email addy is in the “to” box, just in case you accidentally hit send too soon. Saves alot of heartache (as often first drafts are more of a “vent” than a carefully worded missive. Praying for you as you deal with this!
Oh, I am sorry. What a sickening feeling. But at least you were wise in your words so that the mistake wasn’t compounded.
Your comment about your husband made me smile. 🙂
.-= Melissa Howard´s last blog ..Nearly a Double Fail Becomes a Brilliant Lamp =-.
I’ve heard of this happening to many people. When I was a teenager I was gossiping about a fellow classmate and later discovered that she was in the next room and heard everything. I was so sick about it, but I did learn a valuable lesson – it never pays to gossip (although it doesn’t sound like that’s what you were doing). Good luck with this situation.
Hope this helps…sending with love
Proverbs 15
1 A gentle answer deflects anger,
but harsh words make tempers flare.
oh dear.
i know this will happen to me one day. (of course not the same circumstance) i hope i act in grace & repsect like you quickly went to acting.
my friend 2 TIMES has heard a convo over the phone about her, when the ill worded person accidentially dialed her #. i have been on the side of trying to help the friend get through the receiving end. so not fun. no one ever apologized to her, that i know of. i think that would of made it better. i know you will do it whole heartedly!
great reminder post!
kellie
.-= this blessed nest´s last blog ..FALL FESTIVAL week 3!!! =-.
After a similar occurrance, I now save emails as drafts and always leave the the “intended recipient” blank. I read and reread the email several times before adding the email address. Then before sending, I prayerfully read and reread everything again and then slowly, double, triple-checking the email address…I hesitantly hit “send.”
:0)
i’m feeling your pain. thankfully, a couple of times when i hit send i was able to quickly hit unsend (gmail) when i had second thoughts. i will certainly pray that all is resolved soon.
.-= Autumn Beck´s last blog ..The Crazy Month of August =-.
In the grand scheme of life………this too shall pass.
Lisa, Once I addressed two birthday cards to my brother and mother in law and then sent them in the wrong envelopes. I guess that’s not quite as bad but it sure was embarrassing.
Well, good time to remember we are all made of flesh. I already know it will all turn out in the end. I will be praying for you and love you so much!
I have gotten so many messages and emails about this. Thanks so much for helping! I set my email to send after 2 minutes. I never knew I could do that!
Maureen, your comment was so perfect. You’re right. It will be a distant memory soon. Thanks! Lisa~
Praying
.-= Cha Cha´s last blog ..Chocolate Pumpkin Muffins =-.
Ugh. I feel awful for you. Things like this take me a long time to get over. I will pray the Lord will help this pass quickly for you and all involved.
I am *thrilled* to know that I have a delay and unsend function on Gmail. So glad you shared this!
.-= Michele´s last blog ..10 Reasons to be Hospitable =-.
Oh Lisa…
I am in charge of a good sized co-op (55-60 families) and I remember sending an email to the whole group that should have gone to the committee only! Fortunately, I held back on the snarkiness and just talked about their leaving the group, and it turned out ok as everyone just thought I was letting them know….but the panic in my heart!
Perhaps it will be for good as it may give opportunity to address some issues that need to be dealt with. We have at times let somethings go, hoping they would resolve themselves, which they never do…sigh…
Praying that all will work for His glory!
Deanna
.-= Deanna´s last blog .. =-.
You are most welcome Lisa. I can sympathize because I am the queen of making a mountain out of a mole hill……..and I’m working very hard to change that. That statement always puts things into perspective for me.
Lisa,
I can’t really add anything to what the others have said except that it may be divine intervention that she received the email. From the way you said you wrote it, it sounds as if you wrote it more from a point of concern than a point of frustration. Having written it that way, perhaps she will read it and have an ah-ha moment about the way others perceive her actions. Maybe it was meant to be, and you not being able to get in touch with her may be God’s doing so that she has time to stew over it. I’d say just be thankful you were professional and dignified in your email, ans put it behind you.
.-= Polly@makeminebeautiful.blogspot.com´s last blog ..Bird Silhouette Pillows in progress =-.