I have tried many different chore systems and all of them have their pros and cons. But there is one thread that runs through any successful effort to get kids to do chores and that’s you constantly checking after them.
They need accountability, they need to have a clear idea of what is expected of them and they need an occasional refresher lesson. They simply aren’t naturally going to succeed.
I use rewards for the younger kids, but by the time they are 12 they don’t get any “prizes” or payments. The satisfaction of a job well done is reward enough. That’s part of maturing….not expecting extra benefits for doing what needs to be done to keep the family running smoothly. The reward systems when they are young are for teaching….not to be a lifelong practice.
To be clear….I still pay the older kids for some things, just not typical household responsibilities. I never pay for kitchen work, cleaning, laundry, etc. But I would pay them to do bigger jobs like work in my etsy shop, paint, yard work beyond basic mowing, cleaning out my car, and other jobs that I might pay someone else to do.
If you’re wondering what chore systems we use, there are two that I like. The first, for younger kids, is I Did It Myself! And for the whole family I love the book Managers of Their Homes by Teri Maxwell. It’s been around for a long time and I have tweaked it to fit my life, but there’s some great info there.